Sudden Wealth Syndrome and Me: How This Work Took Shape
I Wasn’t Ready for Life-Changing Money
A few years ago, my family explored selling our business.
The numbers being discussed were big enough that I could feel my life about to change overnight. Part of me was excited, and another part completely overwhelmed. Everything felt suddenly unstable, even though from the outside it looked like “good news.” I felt a lot of fear, alongside real excitement, about the possible scale and scope of the change.
At the same time, my closest friends were worrying about very real things: job security, rent increases, and whether they’d ever be able to fund their kids’ college education. I didn’t know how to talk about what was happening in my life without feeling exposed, guilty, or out of touch. So I mostly didn’t talk about it at all. I was so afraid of losing them.
That sense of isolation surprised me. I know money doesn’t actually solve all of life’s problems—but there’s a powerful story we tell that it should. Instead, it complicated my life in ways I didn’t yet have language for.
Now, I’m very grateful that the company didn’t sell. At the time, I was disappointed and confused (and a tiny bit relieved). Looking back, I see that it gave me something invaluable: time. Time to prepare, to grow, and to understand myself more clearly.
When I inherited after my mother passed a few years later, I was able to meet that moment from a much more grounded and stable place. The inheritance was still complex and emotionally charged, but I wasn’t encountering it for the first time. I had already begun building the internal capacity to relate to wealth with more steadiness, discernment, and choice.
Sudden Wealth Syndrome
I now understand that what I was experiencing has a name: Sudden Wealth Syndrome, a term coined by psychologist Stephen Goldbart of the Money, Meaning & Change Institute. Sudden Wealth Syndrome refers to a set of emotional and behavioral challenges that can arise when someone comes into a large amount of money unexpectedly. People experiencing it often feel overwhelmed, isolated, and unsure who to trust, alongside a strong internal pressure to make the “right” decisions as quickly as possible.
I needed support. Was there anyone who could help me navigate this confusing moment?
I Didn’t Belong Anywhere
When I looked for support during the potential sale, the options were oddly narrow.
On one end were coaches and organizations who specialized in divestment—exiting a wealth position early and totally. On the other were more traditional wealth advisors & coaches focused on maximizing returns, preserving capital, and stewarding generational wealth as efficiently as possible.
Neither of these could meet me where I was.
While I plan to give significantly during my lifetime and to distribute the remainder of my money outside of my family upon my death, I wasn’t yet ready to begin thinking about that. I needed time to figure out how money fit into my life first. The ease and spaciousness that money brings is really nice. Being able to help my friends is really nice. Not worrying about my next paycheck is really nice.
At the same time, I wasn’t interested in being groomed to become a steward of generational wealth or in conforming to what Iris Brilliant has described as the “six unspoken rules of the white, wealthy family.” I was concerned with wealth disparity and did not feel aligned with systems that prioritized growth above all else.
Finally, many of the companies and professionals were focused on serving the ultra–high-net-worth crowds - people with $50 million or more in liquid assets. That wasn’t even close to my reality. I’m not Tiger 21 material and live by a budget.
There didn’t seem to be a place for people who:
Are financially independent
Have complex feelings about wealth
Aren’t yet ready to make significant divestments
Feel isolated, confused, excited, and in need of someone to help navigate this moment developmentally, not just financially
I couldn’t find a place where I belonged.
What I Was Actually Looking For
What I wanted was deeper than most of the offers were prepared to go.
I wanted honest conversations about the impact of family wealth and family business. No polished narratives or moral posturing—just a real reckoning with the ways growing up inside systems like this shapes you.
I wanted a place to explore how to build a life beyond work—beyond proving, earning, optimizing, or justifying my existence through output.
I wanted a place where I could be real about the ways this money felt exciting and wonderful, without having to apologize for it or minimize what it made possible for me.
I wanted community with people who shared my context: high net worth, yes, but still tethered to Earth.. People who might still track expenses. People navigating identity shifts, relational strain, and unexpected grief alongside freedom and possibility.
And I wanted to understand why this transition felt so intense—not just psychologically, but physiologically. I wanted to understand the role my nervous system was playing. Why certain conversations felt impossible. Why certain choices felt overwhelming even when, logically, I had “options.”
What I eventually realized was that what was missing wasn’t financial expertise. It was support that worked with me as a whole person. It was someone who understood the terrain because they had walked it.
The Capacities That Actually Matter
I wanted someone who could stay present with me in it—without rushing to fix or change—while also helping me grow in some very specific ways:
How I think:
There were so many new concepts, words, and responsibilities circling, and it felt overwhelming. How could I learn to take them in and integrate them without collapsing into perfectionism or black and white thinking?
How I feel things:
So many feelings were coming up - excitement, guilt and fear just to name a few. I needed help learning how to embrace the full range of emotions, and how to stay present even when they conflicted.
How I relate:
Suddenly, my relationships with other people felt at risk due to the major changes I was facing. I was unsure how to move through this towards more intimacy. I was also interested in cultivating new community and friendship with peers who had similar experiences and questions- but did not know where to find these opportunities.
How I connect:
Staying in relationship with something larger than myself, whether religious, ethical, or values-based, felt more important than ever. At the same time, I could feel how easy it would be to drift into isolation. How could I stay connected to a deeper sense of belonging, and practice redistribution not as obligation, but as kinship?
How I sense:
This transition was stirring new experience in my body. Tightness. Expansion. Activation. Fatigue. I needed to learn how to listen to the wisdom in my nervous system and heart, so my choices could come from steadiness rather than reactivity.
How I bring them all together:
I was awakening to the interconnection of all these pieces of my life. Money, relationships, purpose, my body, myidentity - how could I live in a way where my values, resources, and relationships informed one another instead of pulling me in different directions?
Why This Company Exists
I started this coaching company because I couldn’t find a place that held all of this.
A place that didn’t rush to fix or optimize, or assume certainty where there was actually complexity.
A place that understood that wealth is not just a financial event—it’s a developmental one.
This work isn’t about becoming a better version of yourself. It’s about becoming more whole.
And it’s about creating a place to belong while you do.
A final note
As I reread this, I notice the part of me that wants to protect my vulnerability. “Maybe I should add a line about the world’s tiniest violin,” I think. There is a familiar impulse to minimize this experience so that no one gets hurt, mad, or upset. I want to demonstrate my self‑awareness through self‑deprecation.
This is an old and powerful muscle. Today, I can notice it as a survival strategy, stay with it, and choose not to act from it.
For me, that choice is what this work, and this company, is really about.